The pre-surgery drugs were kicking in and DH was a little loopy. He was slurring his words, eyes slightly closed. Plus he was being uncharacteristically cheeky with the nurses. Finally the doctor, whom I had never met, came to see us and give a run-down of DH’s hernia surgery, follow-up and recovery. The doctor was male, about 35, and smiled a lot. He had a steady gaze and was not bad looking at all.

I listened to the post-surgery care list, before I was to drive Mr. Loopy home. Being my usual uncensored, slightly blonde self, I flippantly asked the doctor, “So will we be able to have sex tonight?”

The doctor paused for a second, looked at me bemused, and said, “Well, I’ll have to check with my wife first…”

I was confused. I thought, why did he bring up his wife? We moved on to other post-surgery concerns, and the doctor said good-bye. Not until months later did it hit me what I unwittingly had said.